So how do you know if you’re picking the right person to settle down with? Some agonize over the decision, afraid the wrong choice will leave them trapped in a loveless marriage or scarred by a bitter divorce. The truth is that knowing you’ve found the right person to marry is not rocket science. It can honestly be one the easiest decisions of your life. Here are four guidelines that will let you know if your significant other is the one from The Art of Manliness by Brett McKay and Kate McKay.
The relationship goes smoothly from the beginning.
The best relationships happen completely naturally from start to finish. The couple meets, they get along swimmingly, they start dating and then they get married. The courtship process is not saddled with DTRs (Define the Relationship talks), frequent fighting and numerous breakups and reconciliations. This is not to say that couples in such volatile relationships shouldn’t get hitched. But the volatility will most likely continue into the marriage. Whether that volatility is acceptable is up to each individual and their sense of the strength of that relationship.
He gets along well with your family and friends.
There are exceptions to this rule: Your boyfriend and one of your friends or family members may simply have clashing personality traits. But in general, it’s a red flag if your significant other does not mix well with your loved ones.
There is nothing major you want to change about her.
There will always be differences and conflicts in a relationship. But if there is something truly significant about your girlfriend that you wish she would change, that is a red flag. In the initial stages of a relationship, when your brain is bathed with love chemicals, you may be willing to overlook the flaw or even find it strangely endearing. But after several years, when the love chemicals have ebbed, this trait may begin to grate on your soul. Remember, people seldom change, and marriage won’t magically resolve your issues.
He’s your best friend.
Physical attraction and chemistry are obviously crucial to any relationship. But at the core of the relationship should be a strong and deeply rooted friendship. Forty years down the line you’re both going to be soft, wrinkly and saddled with low libidos. The thing that will hold your marriage together when you’re old and gray is your friendship. Therefore, if you feel like your boyfriend is your best friend in the world, there is a very good chance that he is the one for you. Do you want to spend all your time with him? Does he make any situation from going to a ballgame to doing your taxes more enjoyable? Do you feel like you could tell him anything and that he knows more about you than anyone in the world? Yes? Well then, he’s a keeper.
Need even more? Here are 32 signs that show you have a future together and 24 signs you don’t.