Weird science: If you want to build a relationship with your guy, clinical evidence says you should consider applying the “The 30-day Rule.” From Death of the Cheating Man: What Every Woman Must Know about Men Who Stray.
Popular belief is that women are more emotionally attached to sex than men are. Not true; men can be as emotionally attached to sex when a woman gives it to us at the right time.
For most men, that time is during the first thirty days of getting to know a woman. That’s when a woman has our full attention, interest and testosterone riled up. When sex is mixed in at the right time, it forms a chemical charge inside of a man that causes a reaction with our dopamine.
During my research for this book, I learned about dopamine from a well-respected clinical psychologist. Dopamine is a natural drug of sorts that we humans have. It’s some serious stuff! Some doctors refer to it as the “pleasure potion.” In fact, it’s so lethal that it’s the chemical that the drug cocaine affects in the human body. Both women and men have it, but males are said to have about 500 percent more of it than women, and it is the signal that tells us we are experiencing extreme pleasure.
When a man’s head and body are aligned in pleasure, he tells himself that if he continues to be with the woman that he’s experiencing the feeling with, then he will be able to continue to feel elation if he stays with her. Ever wonder why some women always get a good-looking or successful man, even though they may not look like they would be able to? It’s because she doped him up! That means she gave him the nookie at the right time and got his dopamine jumping.
HOW DO YOU KNOW WHEN IT’S THE RIGHT TIME?
Here’s the key part to the rule. If a man gets it too soon, then he tells himself the woman is easy and she probably gives her nookie the same way to any man. That cheapens the experience for a man and consequently, we don’t feel special.
Understand this point: men need to feel special. We want to feel like whatever a woman is doing, she’s doing because of us—not because she is easy to any man that gives her the right attention.
Usually, if two people are dating regularly, somewhere around the third or fourth date is the perfect time to catch a man at his most vulnerable state of mind. It’s usually the time where we are equally invested into getting the woman and getting the nookie. So, if two people are dating about once a week, which in my opinion, is the minimum time that a man should be putting in if he’s really trying to get to know a woman, then within a month’s time, they should be getting together for the third or fourth date and that’s when the connection is most powerful.
Don’t believe me? Well, a recent survey showed that most couples that got married within the first three years of their relationship had sex within the first thirty days. That’s proof that if you wanna lock a man down—knock a man down by the end of thirty days!
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