The cohost of TLC’s What Not to Wear dishes on the five biggest fashion offenders: hoodie sweatshirts, light-wash jeans, shapeless T-shirts, and more. Take thee to your closet and purge! From Freakin’ Fabulous on a Budget.
If you have more than one sweatshirt and one hoodie in your closet, get rid of them! Start replacing them with casual completer pieces, like a cotton-canvas, leather, or denim jacket. Cardigans, too!
So long, light-wash jeans. Polished, dark-wash denim free of distressing, rips, or tears will always look more expensive.
Throw out every shapeless, unisex T-shirt you own. Opt for a blouse with seams, darts, and details. I think the word blouse scares some women; it makes them think of an elderly relative. But a blouse is just a shirt that is cut for a woman! It doesn’t have to be silk, charmeuse, or any fancy fabric. It just has to have a little bit of feminine detail to it.
Backpacks—they’re good for lugging around heavy textbooks. If you’re worried about your back and shoulders, lighten the load in your bag and opt for a tote or a crossbody bag. A couple of shoulder presses now and again wouldn’t hurt either.
Cross-trainers—this is probably the most pervasive mistake happening in America right now. I don’t know where the hell people got the idea that it was okay to wear cross-trainers at all times. I blame Jerry Seinfeld. The shoe always, always, always sets the tone for an outfit. And cross-trainers say that you are a tourist. A tourist in your own land!
Speaking of tourists, there are few things that make me cringe more than sitting at a sidewalk café in Paris, sipping a café au lait, and spotting a gaggle of Americans, all pointing at the Eiffel Tower and all wearing white cross-trainers. Aaaargh! My skin crawls just thinking about it!
They’re fine for the gym (or when you’re eighty-three), but for everyday life, there are better options!
Freakin’ Fabulous on a Budget
The style guru and author of Freakin’ Fabulous shows you how to have it all—haute fashion, food and décor—at bargain-basement prices. As co-host of TLC’s popular What Not to Wear and ABC’s The Chew, Clinton Kelly is constantly helping his guests look and feel their best. Now he’s going to share his secrets for making every part of your life more fabulous—whether you want to make over your wardrobe, add glamour to your next soiree, or brighten up that dingy bathroom—even if there’s no room in your budget. As Kelly doles out wit and wisdom on everything from thrift store sprees to proper dinner etiquette, he playfully reminds you that you don’t need to be a movie star to live like one…as long you shop smartly. Remember, anybody can be fabulous—it’s not the size of your funds but how you use them.
I Hate Everyone, Except You
Bestselling author and television host Clinton Kelly pens a hilariously candid, deliciously snarky collection of essays about his journey from awkward kid to slightly-less-awkward adult. Clinton Kelly is probably best known for teaching women how to make their butts look smaller. But in I Hate Everyone, Except You, he reveals some heretofore-unknown secrets about himself, like that he’s a finicky connoisseur of 1980s pornography, a disillusioned critic of New Jersey’s premier water parks, and perhaps the world’s least enthused high-school commencement speaker. Whether he’s throwing his baby sister in the air to jumpstart her cheerleading career or heroically rescuing his best friend from death by mud bath, Clinton leaps life’s social hurdles with aplomb. With his signature wit, he shares his unique ability to navigate the stickiest of situations, like deciding whether it’s acceptable to eat chicken wings with a fork on live television (spoiler: it’s not). Clinton delves into all these topics—and many more—in this thoroughly unabashedly frank and uproarious collection.